Sex.God. - Chapter Four: Leather, Whips, and Fruit

Leather, Whips, and Fruit. I'm a fan of two of the three.

Still, this chapter isn't so much about any of these things. Instead, it's about the lust we often have for people, behaviors, or objects and how the things we lust after never seem to fulfill us like we think they will - leading us to further pursue our own desires instead of redirecting our energies into something worthwhile.

Bell returns to Genesis to explore the first time man gave into lust and the destruction that followed. When Adam & Eve gave into the temptation before them in the garden, their eyes opened to "another way for people to live, outside of how God designed things." Their innocence was shattered and their eyes opened to the knowledge of good and evil as they indulged their lustful desires. No longer were their lives centered around all that was good. Evil had now entered the scene. But the evil wasn't in the juice of a shiny, red apple, for nothing is inherently wrong with fruit. "The problem for Adam and Eve is what the fruit has come to represent. Rebellion against God. Rejection of the good, the true, and the beautiful. Another way." Bell argues, "When these first people eat the fruit, it isn't about the fruit, it's about their dissatisfaction with the world God has placed them in. Creation isn't good enough for them."

Logically it seems foolish to choose another way. To reject all of "the good, the true, and the beautiful" things God has prepared for us. But we do it all the time, and in doing so we're essentially telling God what he's given us isn't good enough. We get prideful and believe we are owed better, then we seek better elsewhere. "The idea creeps into our head and heart that we are lacking, that we are incomplete, that this craving in front of us is the answer." We lust after what we don't have and seek means of attaining what we believe we deserve. Often times we chase something [or someone] to meet a need or compensate for what we're lacking, but we usually end up disappointed because "lust promises what it can't deliver."

Bell goes on to say that "lust is slavery" because it brings us to the point where we "can't conceive of being content without it," at which point we are controlled by it. And because lust promises what it can't deliver, it "always leads to anger." It's this vicious cycle of discontent. One disappointment followed by another.

To break the cycle and become free of lust, Bell says "we have to move from being darkened in our understanding to being enlightened in our understanding." Becoming enlightened requires asking the tough questions. Questions like: What is this craving promising? Can it deliver? Is this lust about something else? What is the lie here? Have I been tempted like this before? Have I given in before? What was it like? Did it work? Was I more satisfied or more empty? We must also redirect our energy. Bell says, "Life is not about toning down and repressing your God-given life force. It's about channeling it and focusing it and turning it loose on something beautiful, something pure and true and good, something that connects you with God, with others, with the world." We must discover how we can make our life about this so we are not tempted to give in to that.

Oddly enough, this chapter [about lust] totally hit home with me. So often I am focused on what is missing from my life instead of appreciating all that God has given me. I lust. I lust after my own ideals. What I believe would be best for my life. In doing this I regrettably reveal my mistrust of God. I question his craftmanship and his design for my life. Instead of trusting God's timing, I pursue my own plan and my own desires. I waste time wallowing in discontent instead of embracing my current station in life. I live in the past and concentrate on what could have been rather than finding peace with what has become. I miss the blessings because I'm too busy seeking out more.

Still, God's mercies are new each day, and each day I can choose on what to focus. So, as a display of my desire to fully trust God, I will choose to focus on this [all he has blessed me with] so I am not tempted to give in to that [a lustful pursuit of my own desires].