06.24.06
My favorite verse has always been Jeremiah 29:11. It reads, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Lately I've been asking myself how much I truly trust God. Sometimes it feels like he's leading me nowhere. Like he's rolling the dice on my life and trying to figure out what to do with me.
This past week at camp we discussed the "I am" statements of Jesus. My favorite was "I am the good shepherd." In one small group session we looked at a story in the bible that I've heard several times throughout my life. Though this time I saw it differently. We talked about a time when Jesus healed a blind man. To do so Jesus spat in dirt and placed the mud over the man's eyes. Although I had never thought about it before, I found it significant that Jesus used mud. It got me thinking that sometimes it take a little mud to get us to the place where we can see Jesus. It takes enduring the discomfort of mud, the hard and painful things in life, for us to experience the great life Jesus has for us. Still we can find comfort in the fact that Jesus is our good shepherd. That he knows, loves, and protects us like a shepherd does his sheep. He has proven himself the good shepherd by sacrificing his life for us. Because of this we can trust that he will lead us when life gets tough and there's mud in our eyes. We just have to be willing to act like sheep. To listen to the shepherd's voice and follow.
God often speaks to me through music. This morning I was listening to "Table for Two" by Caedmon's Call. In it Derek Webb sings, "You can't plan the ends and not plan the means." This struck me because during rough times I often feel like God has forgotten me. Like these "great plans" he has for my life are so far off that I may never see them. I forget that not only has God planned my future (who i will marry, the career i will choose, etc.), but he has also planned my present. He has planned the means that will ultimately lead me to the ends. I often see painful and confusing times as a detour from the plans God has for my life instead of seeing them as the stepping stones to where God wants to bring me. I focus on the mud in my eyes instead of trusting that once the mud is washed from my eyes I will be able to see things more clearly.
It brings such peace to realize that God has a plan for my life. Both the good and the bad. The means and the ends. It comforts me to know that he will see me through the difficult times in my life, and that he will never give me more than I can handle. That he will be near to me when I am broken hearted and remind me of his love for me. That he has willed the painful and difficult times in my life as a way of revealing himself and his power to me. As a way of reminding me that he is my shepherd and has amazing things planned for my future. Plans to prosper me and not to harm me. Plans to give me hope and a future.
Epiphany.
<3
You know the plans that you have for me,
and you can't plan the end and not plan the means.
So i suppose i just need some peace
to get me to sleep.
(Table for Two: Caedmon's Call)
Coming Soon: Searching for God Knows What by Donald Miller